I recently read in the Huffington Post that women would trade their intelligence for larger breasts. The story goes that 1,100 18 to 25 year old women were asked if they would trade their IQ's for bigger breasts and one third of the women said they would!!!!! 41% also said they would rather have bigger breasts than a higher IQ and 24% of the ones who preferred bigger breast said they would chose this because "they would make them look prettier."
Let me enlighten these idiots since I have ample :) prespective on this topic. Up until the age of 12 I was a slim flat chested girl who took ballet lessons at the London Royal Academy of Ballet in Mexico City and was quite good at it. The summer of 78 was my second year at Camp Quinebarge in New Hampshire and it was here that for the first time I became aware of breast relevance because of Tandy Betts.
Tandy was (probably still is) a gorgeous 15 year old blonde who went around camp bra-less. All the boys thought this was wonderful and she was motive for gossip and plenty of envy among the girls.The summer of 1978 was also the year I got mine, they were not expected and it seemed like they appeared out of the blue, all of a sudden - BAM!!! breasts!!! Needless to say I was semi-oblivious to them except for the fact that due to their size I very likely had to shift my center of gravity! So not only have I carried my large breasts around since age 12 which makes me a "de facto" expert, but I have also carried around bigger ones during and after my pregnancies. So from 34C in my "golden" years to 40E shortly after #1 was born (or as I like to lovingly call him "the 11 pounder") - I know it all!!
First from ages 12 to 32 at a solid 34C they hung on my chest happily and unassuming. I hate to break this to all but there were no hoards of men following me around wanting to look down my chest or whistling from construction sites. During high school I had a few boyfriends and I hope they chose me because I could carry a conversation and had a great sense of who I would become. But then again this is my impression, we can take a poll if needed, most of them are on Facebook. Later, during University and Medical School I know I was chosen because I was smart as there are very few opportunities to flaunt breasts around when your nose is tied to the books and you want to graduate.
Second let me say that mine have always been purely ornamental ie. they were useless for their intended evolutionary purpose - breast feeding. The 11-pounder required a substantial amount of nutrition and I just did not have it in me to give. No amount of Domperidone was going to help even after using the dreaded green sucking/pumping machine, 3 oz was all I ever got while the child needed 8 oz at age 24 hours because he was born the size of a 6 month old. The size increase of my breasts did not make me look prettier at all, if anything it made me look like a top heavy hippo. So nix the "they will make me look prettier" argument.
You will never catch a Plastic surgeon saying this but here is the unadulterated thruth - large breasts are a nuisance, or at least REAL large breasts! Bras that will hold them up are hard to find and the straps cause indentations on your shoulders. Sleeping on your front leads to them relocating themselves under the armpits and they get in the way. Sleeping on your side means they are squished in the middle (gravity). Sleep on your back and they slide off to each side (gravity again). Run with them and you will need an industrial design strong bra to keep them in place and forget being aerodynamic during running, the wind drag alone will cost you a few minutes of every race, then again all other runners will thank you for creating a wind tunel and coast behind you so you will make new friends!!
My intelligence on the other hand has always been a cherised treasure, it got me through school, high school University, medical school, a MSc degree, residency, two fellowships and a post-doc fellowship. AND it got me a job!! A really good one!! That I love!!
So NOOOOOOO I would not relinquish a single drop of my IQ for larger breasts. As has been said before - A mind is a terrible thing to waste.
No comments:
Post a Comment