WHO loves you?

Today is mother's day in Mexico - 10 de Mayo Dia de las Madres, forever etched in my memory .

In this day and age where the value and meaning of being a mother is being debated on CNN on a daily basis and Hilary Rosen makes statements like "Ann Romney has never worked a day in her life" because she has been a stay at home mother for her entire life I wonder - what exactly does it mean to be a mother nowadays? Who is a mother?

It used to be easy, your mother was the woman who contributed half her DNA to making you, carried you around in her uterus for 9 months and pushed you out of her body. But this old definition is trite and old fashioned now and we have to come up with a new definition.

Lately, I find myself needing a pre-load mother defining word, biological mother, adoptive mother, surrogate mother, foster mother, working mother, stay-at-home mother, the list goes on and on. So, which am I? Well, let's see, I am a biological mother to my biological children but I think I am also often a surrogate mother (not in the sense that I carried them) but in the I-am-here-if-you-need-me kind of way to some other children and my patients. I can also sometimes be an adoptive mother to some neighborhood stragglers with working mothers who need a few hours of shelter in my house. I am also a working mother and sometimes during my "work" holidays I am also a stay-at-home mother. So am I all mothers?

In the ends it comes down to this - Who LOVES YOU? (thank you Joe Biden for the inspiration). WHO LOVES YOU? THAT is your mother, whether they contributed half of their DNA or not, whether they carried you or not, whether they work outside the home or stay at home. The woman (or sometimes women) who are in your life on a regular basis, take care to make sure you are happy and love you THAT is your mother. And  by the way, you do not have to have JUST one mother either.

So I AM a mother, I love my biological children and other children. I make sure they are happy if they live in my house and do my darndest when they do not - particularly for my patients. I love them with hugs and kisses but I also love them with nagging. I love them when I want them to eat well, dress in clean clothes, not smell :), exercise, brush their teeth, make them learn and push them to try new experiences. I love them when I listen to their thoughts and ideas. I love them when I arrange for another mother to pick them up from school or other activities. I love them when I make sure their friends are safe and happy. I also love them when I am working to make money and make sure they have everything they need.

So to all of us out there being mothers today and every other day - GOOD JOB!