Tribute to my "new" country.

Today was Canada Day, my first as an official citizen of this beautiful country. We (and what seemed to be all other British Columbians living on the lower mainland) made our way to the low tide at Spanish Banks. The traffic was brutal, there was nowhere to park but everyone was civilized, no honking, no insults, no cutting in line, no taking advantage of the people waiting for cherished parking spots. In summary all very CANADIAN.

We set up camp between a large Filipino family and a large group of students. #1 went off to find the good tide pools for skim boarding while #2 and I sat. He, under the umbrella and complaining of the heat (this child has ZERO Mexican DNA - you should know) and me, sitting in the sun. We lounged there in peace and enjoyed the day.

As I sat there looking at the cargo ships, the North Shore mountains, some still covered in snow, the beautiful beach in low tide, the sound of the ocean, all kinds of families BBQing, children laughing, children playing in the sand, people walking by, people flying kites, beach volleyball everywhere, Sebastian with his bright orange shirt skim boarding and Benjamin by my side with a book in his hands my only thought was: I LIVE IN PARADISE.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANADA!

Mexico vs Brazil

Every day I travel from my house to work along 33rd and obviously I must be doing this driving in a zombie-like state every morning AND every afternoon because I had not noted that at the corner of Victoria street sits the Vancouver Alpen Club or the Deutsches Haus Restaurant. Now you will ask, why did you notice today? Well ................. because of THE WORLD CUP!!!

At first it just looked like there was an excess of parked cars but then I saw that most of them had German flags on them. Now my first thought was well there must be a German family that is hosting a party (this at 8 am you should know) but then I saw a long line of people that extended around the corner and saw the BIG Deutches sign - AHHHHHH that is why!! These super dedicated soccer fans had gotten up to go line up at the German bar at 8am!! Good. For. Them.

One of the coolest things about experiencing the World Cup in Canada is that EVERYBODY is from somewhere else and multiculturalism makes for a GREAT atmosphere. One of our psychologist, let's call her Dr. L is a soccer FAN, yes with caps - FAN! For the last two World Cups Dr. L has run the work World Cup "pool" or "assigned teams". 

Here I use her first World Cup update (which she writes under the pseudonym of Claudio Lilincha) e-mail explaining the process. First she writes a disclaimer: "expect exaggeration, mild bad taste and mildly offensive national stereotypes. This was not written on work time. No animals were harmed in the makingof this update". Then the welcome: "Good morning sports fans and welcome to the 2014 Psychology World Cup Pool. There is no money in this pool, only mockery and bragging rights.  Team assignments were completed semi-randomly as follows:  last year’s winner picked first, then people with actual national affiliations were assigned their teams (thus Mexico is MINE), then remaining psychologists picked (yeah suuuuuure, of course, we have no idea how the organizer ended up with the host and most promising team - BRAZIL! but we will let that one go). Other invited guests picked after. Staff who joined the program after the draw were added in a completely arbitrary way.  Other than psychologists, inclusion was based mostly on who was hanging around in the hallway on the day we picked."

So now every day we rouse, go to work and rumble. So far it has been fairly civilized except for the unintended colleague "tripping" in the hall or the hiding of their favorite chair or the cryptic I-have-no-idea-where-that-chart-you-are-looking-for-is look or again the totally unintended and totally accidental locking them out of their office multiple times. Totally. Unintended.

Tomorrow Mexico plays Brazil, ie. Me AGAINST. Dr. L. So today I had every intention to get her to eat some bad shrimp that way she would spend the night experiencing intestinal distress and perhaps kill Brazil's luck but I got busy with patients and she was in meetings all day. I was also thinking of pinning a "kick me" sign to her back but that is just plain juvenile right? Tonight I plan to park outside her house and play the car radio loudly so that she can't sleep. This WILL ENSURE Brazil's abysmal performance on the field tomorrow. Wish me luck!

PRE-traumatic stress disorder

The other day I was being my overworried mother self: "Where exactly is this event that you are going to?" "Who are you going with?" "How are you getting there?" "What do you mean you are biking there?" "Well, have you checked what time the sun sets?" "NO? well do you have decent bike lights?" "What are you going to wear then, you can't wear dark colors, you'll get hit by a car!" "What is your route, I need to know where to start looking if you go missing?" "Will you carry a cell phone?" "I DO NOT CARE if it is to bulky on the bike!" "Well, carry a fanny pack." "NO, I don't care it fanny packs are for wussies"

Now, I must preface, #1 is a GOOD GOOD egg but a teenager good egg nonetheless so after the 10th eye roll  this ended with me yelling "YOU KNOW I AM JUST TRYING TO ENSURE YOUR WELL BEING RIGHT?" (please refer to previous blog Nagging IS loving behaviour). Finally all questions answered and all plans made an agreement is made and off the child goes.

This was all heard by #2 who was quietly watching the exchange (and GOD I hope learning from it!!) and once #1 was out the door he says to me (with the accompanying roll of the eyes) "Jeeeeezz, mother you constantly worry and ask so many questions you are so..... so.... so .... PARENTAL!!!" Yes, he called me parental. I think it is a good thing that I was called parental but I am sure it is more like a new vernacular teenage lingo word that actually means "HOLY-CRAP-can-you-BELIEVE-my mother!". Anyway I chose to make it a good word and will wear my "parentality" proudly.

Parenting, it is a tough bussiness eh? A few months ago #1 asked to go to a party and I AGAIN asked 10,000 questions. Now #1 is saying that I am always anticipating the worst and do not need to be so worried, apparently I have PRE-traumatic stress disorder. Finally he said "I am going with (cue heavenly music and God like heavenly rays) .... SAM"

Now, let me tell you about Sam because every household should have a Sam. Sam is a giant 6 foot 3 inches tall 15 year old young man and he plays rugby. This Sam is FOCUSSED, yes, all in caps, FOCUSSED and he is FOCUSSED because he is this close to receiving a rugby scholarship to an Australian University so he does NOTHING WRONG. Seriously, NOTHING, he will not expose himself to drinking (maybe he figures he will do plenty of it once he is recruited), he will not go near drugs and he studies hard. Sam will not risk his scholarship chances AT ALL. I should say that I think #1 would also not do any of these things but it is nice to have what I have taken to calling - SAMinsurance :)

So there they go off on the bus to a party that they did not know the address to but knew how to get to (do we agree already an issue?). Anyway I gave. Midnight and no word from them. So I text "all good?" and I get a CALL, YES, A CALL!! You know something is not quite right when a teenager USES a phone as it was intended. He calls to say they have left the party because the kids were drinking and getting stoned (15 year olds) and can someone come get them. So, I had to be "parental" and go get them of course.

It is almost mother's day and I have decided to honour the day as follows: I will curb the PREtraumatic stress disorder BUT continue to be PARENTAL!!! Happy Mother's Day!!!

I. AM. CANADIAN.

Tomorrow, on Friday March 14th at exactly 10:45 I will became a Canadian Citizen after 23 years of living in Canada. WHAT took you sooooooooooooo loooooooooong you might ask?

Well, I had started this process before and it got pretty far, (as far as all-we-need-now-are-your-fingerprints-and-its-almost-done) BUUUUUT .......... I never got it done and my application lapsed. You see it was 2006. And 2006 was THE year!! the VERY important year!

The year for what you say? Well the year I had been waiting for for the last 16 YEARS!!! YES! 16 YEARS!! 2006 was THE YEAR OF THE  CANADIAN ROYAL COLLEGE EXAM! Yes, after 16 years of re-training I was going to finally be certified to practice medicine in Canada (provided I passed the exam - which of course I did after studying really hard for 12 months), so you can see how travelling with a Canadian passport and voting in Federal elections (really the only two "extra" perks you get from being a citizen rather than a permanent resident) may not have been a priority at the time.

But NOW it is 2014 and .........  I. Am. Ready. So tomorrow at 10:45 I will wear red and proudly say the Canadian citizenship oath:  "I affirm that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second, Queen of Canada, her heirs and successors and I will faithfully observe the laws of Canada and fulfil my duties as a Canadian citizen". Then I assume there will be applause and hugs and happy wishes.

After that I am hoping Canadianism will just fill me up with glee and joy so that I can say eh? without feeling like I am faking it, say sorry all the time and mean it, be passionate about hockey and beer, enjoy all winter sports, skate like I have been doing it all my life, know and properly identify all animals in the tundra, know how to build an igloo ;), buy shares of Tim Horton's, love maple syrup, continue to enjoy bacon (Canadian bacon that is), put vinegar on my fries (I. Dont. Think. So - YUCK!), and eat poutine.

No, seriously, all kidding aside I WILL BE PROUD TO BE A CANADIAN because:

1) Canada has welcomed me with opens arms
2) I have two Canadian kids
3) I have friends of all shapes, colors and nationalities in this multiculturalism heaven
4) Canada treats women and men equally
5) Same sex marriage is like any other marriage
6) Canada sees value in families and allows for a one year paid parental leave
7) Universal health care
8) Canada is committed to multilateralism and most importantly FIERCELY committed to peacekeeping efforts.
9) It has made environmental efforts one if it's top priorities
and
10) Canada is A GOOD SOLID KIND WELCOMING COUNTRY for those who come next

But let's face it mostly I am hoping that becoming Canadian means that I will never be cold again!!!!

Thank you Canada for becoming my adoptive land. I am sure we will be happy together eh?

15 years later - I wish you the best!

Yesterday I met for dinner with a bunch of women who I had not seen for at least 15 years. I occasionally run into a few of them at the grocery store or Tim Horton's or the Second Cup or even in the halls of British Columbia's Children's Hospital where most of us work.

Unfortunately, those quick meetings are always at the expense of having to go somewhere else, pick up children somewhere, need to get to a meeting somewhere or to see a patient somewhere. Nonetheless, we make time to exchange the quickest of hugs and hellos and a very heartfelt "I'm so glad to see you. I miss you". Needless to say these stolen few seconds of every day life are never enough to bring ourselves up to date.

So yesterday we met. We met!!!! We had 15 years of catchup to do. When we were together 15 years ago some of us were struggling with major life decisions and now those decisions have been made and I am proud to say they led us down a good path.  Some of us were beginning new careers now we are old farts who know what we are doing. 15 years ago a few of us were pregnant now those kids are adolescents!!!

Last night, we shared happy and sad moments. We remembered patients lost and we thanked them for the learning they provided. We remembered colleagues. We reminisced about the past.  I thanked them for the shower they threw me when I was pregnant with Sebastian and I also thanked them for looking in on Benjamin when he was intubated in the special care nursery, a task that they did willingly (sometimes in the middle of the night) when I was not there. I thanked them for all of the things they taught me when I began my career as a doctor in Canada. I thanked them for their friendship and company, EVEN if we have not seen each other in a very long time.

We gossiped too, a lot!!!! Really, what reunion is a good reunion without it's good share of gossip?  We laughed and laughed.

I am glad to say that 15 years later we are mostly healthy and mostly happy. Last night we looked back but we also looked forward. Forward to new adventures, to new challenges, to the joy of grandchildren (really Joan, a grandmother? IMPOSSIBLE to believe as my kids said when I showed them the pictures because Joan you should know, looks like a teenager).

I look forward to the next 15 years. I look forward to seeing you all again in the halls at Children's, or the neighbourhood, or the coffee shop or the grocery store and catching a quick glance of each other while on our hurried way to something else and quietly thinking "We did well didn't well? I can't talk right now but you know, I WISH YOU THE BEST!".

Super Bowl Sunday.

In case you didn't know Mexicans are HUGE American Football fans. I would venture to say they are just as fanatical about football as they are about soccer. Maybe more?

Thus I grew up with it at home. All season long my father and brothers would watch all and any football  game available on TV. Yep, every Saturday, Sunday AND Monday night. And by osmosis so would I. This is how I learned about football just by being around. When it wasn't yet cool or expected for girls to know about football I KNEW about football. I was not only aware, I was knowledgeable!

Yes, knowledgeable. I know how the game is played, how to keep score, the difference between a touch down and a field goal, what being hit behind the line of scrimmage is and how many yards they need to advance with each down. I know about offensive units, defensive units and special team units. I know the difference between a lineman and a receiver. I know the difference between a fullback and a halfback and yes I also know what a tight end is and NO it has nothing to do with how tight their butt is!

By age 16 I could spew off names and had opinions about quarterbacks like Dan Marino, Terry Bradshaw, John Elway, Joe Montana, even Joe Namath (jeez this dates me huh?). I even knew who OJ Simpson was before he began behaving badly.

I remember the team of choice at home was of course the Dallas Cowboys. FYI - this is possibly "Mexico's team" in the sense that A LOT of Mexicans like the Dallas Cowboys. One of my brothers however, has always been partial to the Seahawks and I hope that this is their and also HIS and his kids' year.

We were such fans that on my 15th birthday we took a trip to Dallas and my Dad bought tickets for us to watch a game while there. I don't think it was specially for my birthday, at 15 I was probably much more interested in clothes but I remember the game. I remember it being very cold and us having a discussion with the people behind us who were supporting the other team.

Over time I have come to realize how much this fascination with American football has become part of the fabric of my life. You have probably already noticed but different sport games have different sounds. I can distinguish (without looking at the TV) the stadium sound of a soccer game, a football game and/or a hockey game. They are distinct in the noise the fans make, the music they play and the noise from the game itself.

That very recognizable sound, the sound of an football game on TV is part of the ever present soundtrack of my life so much so that when I first arrived in Canada and was feeling homesick and lonely I would turn the TV on to a football game and INSTANTLY feel at home. I still do it once in a while, turn the TV on while I cook and BANG back home!!! Flood of memories.

Tomorrow is Super Bowl Sunday and there will not be a party and a bacchanalian feast like there was at my house when I was growing up but I will be watching and more importantly I will be .... FEELING AT HOME!!

GO SEAHAWKS!!!

Be okay.

Every year around this uphill January climb I start wondering what will this new year bring, what surprises await me? will it be happy? will it be sad? and most of the time I think of it as a passive process ie. what will IT do? Today I thought ..... HANG ON!!! I can do something about this. I am NOT at the mercy of what might happen!

I think this at other times (the not being at the mercy part) but today after paying a gazillion dollars in professional dues, having put out about 50 unexpected fires and feeling a little out of control I thought okay, all hands on deck - what am I going to do to make this a HAPPY 2014. So here goes , not exactly resolutions but more like things I need to do:

1) LET LIFE FLOW - if you know me, this will be hard, I have minimal ;) but prevalent control issues.

2) LET GO - if you know me, this will be hard, I have minimal ;) but prevalent letting go issues.

3) BREATHE - easy to say eh? Cant really NOT breathe, physiologically impossible. But I mean breathe in a Namaste West Coast kinda way.

4) LOOK AROUND - I do this already all the time but I want to be MINDFUL when I look around.

5) TAKE TIME TO BE QUIET AND SERENE - if you know me, THIS WILL BE HARD!!! I have minimal ;) but prevalent be quiet and serene issues. Clearly this is an ongoing theme.

6) I am mostly okay, but be MORE okay (overachieving eh?) should go on the list. Now I am just going to be stressed about being okay - Oh yeah forgot #3 BREATHE.

7) On the more mundane list of things I'd like to accomplish: Publish my short stories, take photography classes, visit Rome and walk the streets while being MINDFUL, continue to do the job that I love, eat healthy and exercise plus all of the other expected resolutions stuff.

Wish me luck. Namaste.